I meet many moms who ask, ” How do I get my teenager to clean up their room and keep it organized?” If you could hear them, their voice is strained and there is usually a heavy sigh at the end of the question. Just like us, teenagers motivations vary and, just like us, they have a reason for where they put things. So, although I am an organizing consultant, I can only tell you what has worked in our family. They can be best summarized into three criteria:

1. Expectations: Yours vs. theirs. The teenager will need to raise their expectation of what a clean room is and you, as the parent, will have to lower yours. Have a conversation with your teen and come to some kind of baseline level of what an acceptable room would look like. Get some buy in and keep your end of the bargain. My 15 year old son hated putting his clothes away in dresser drawers, we compromised and removed the dresser. He now hangs everything up. His socks and underwear are stored in baskets on the closet shelf. This small change has made him more successful in keeping his room neat.
2. Planning: Find out how the teenager will want to organize their room and see if there is any suggestions you can offer (not dictate!). Offer to provide containers or bins needed. Get a clothes basket for their room, if they don’t already have one. Decide what items or furnishings need to be removed and/or replaced. The toy chest, for example, that used to hold Lego’s is probably an inefficient use of space in a teenager’s room.
3. Praise: This one is huge! Even if the task is not finished, be sure to compliment your teenager when you notice a change for the good. Praising is the opposite of nagging and can go a long way in getting your teenager to continue the project. They will still need to be reminded of what the expectations are but do this in a gracious way (or they accuse you of nagging). Think about your boss and how you would want to be talked to when asked to improve in a certain area. Use the same tact with your teenager.

I would love to hear from some of you who have teenagers as to what works for getting them organized. Let’s share the love!